A quick session of lovemaking because of the man's lack of staying power can be very disappointing to a woman. Little wonder that one of the most common searches on the net is for tips to last longer in bed! A premature climax to a couple's lovemaking can deprive the woman of the satisfaction which is her reward from lovemaking. She will perhaps decide that her partner either does not take her needs into account or that he is selfish. And a man who reaches climax too soon often feels like he is a weak, inadequate man.
None of this is constructive for the the man and woman concerned, particularly when the matter is not honestly talked about. Regrettably, the shame produced by sexual problems like this is hugely stressful, and the man and woman often continue on with this big subject continuing to erode trust and respect. So the question is, what can you do? The reassuring news is - you have the power to resolve this!
First, you should discuss it honestly: in simple terms, this means you talk about what you are feeling. Unfortunately, in actual fact our work demonstrates as few as 10% of couples are willing to talk about male or female issues with lovemaking. So, to help you reveal how you feel about sex, try these tricks to guide you:
1) Speak about yourself - please do not use the tactic of avoiding responsibility by blaming your spouse. Being able to listen openly without reacting emotionally means you will encounter a lot less resistance - and your partner is likely to be a lot more able to hear what you say without ending the discussion.
2) Don't think your partner is reponsible - being able to accept that you are both responsible for any emotional distress in the relationship is essential to eliminating mutual distrust. Only when you understand that your partner's actions and feelings are an honest reaction to the challenges you face, and that they are entitled to feel that way, can you start to see yourselves as you actually are.
3) Don't engage in self-blame. Doing something is more helpful. This may mean getting the support of a couple's counselor. Or it may mean strategies as easy as reserving time every day to speak to your spouse about what is "up" for you.
4) If you have challenges discussing sexual difficulties consider the things you wish to "bring to the table" before you start. Being prepared is vital in achieving the respect of your partner. It's also important to know what is unacceptable to you in any debate about sex. That way you will be much more likely to keep your self-respect.
5) Be clear about why you are raising the issue. It's often difficult to have full awareness of what's behind our emotions, and it's possible you may only fully realize the real issue as you discuss the problem. And, if you are clear what you want to change, you are more likely to get it. The more openly you express yourself, the more honestly you speak about what's going on for you, the more bonded you will feel in your relationship.
Step 2 - work as a couple on a trusted self-help program for treating male rapid climax. There are several to choose from on the net and a brief search will be enough to discover something that works for you. The essential features you ought to seek out are: genuine references, a money-back guarantee, and an author who is willing to engage with you by email. I have shown in more than 10 years' work men with sexual dysfunction that self-help programs work just as well as clinical therapy for almost all men, if they are highly ready to improve their sexual performance.
None of this is constructive for the the man and woman concerned, particularly when the matter is not honestly talked about. Regrettably, the shame produced by sexual problems like this is hugely stressful, and the man and woman often continue on with this big subject continuing to erode trust and respect. So the question is, what can you do? The reassuring news is - you have the power to resolve this!
First, you should discuss it honestly: in simple terms, this means you talk about what you are feeling. Unfortunately, in actual fact our work demonstrates as few as 10% of couples are willing to talk about male or female issues with lovemaking. So, to help you reveal how you feel about sex, try these tricks to guide you:
1) Speak about yourself - please do not use the tactic of avoiding responsibility by blaming your spouse. Being able to listen openly without reacting emotionally means you will encounter a lot less resistance - and your partner is likely to be a lot more able to hear what you say without ending the discussion.
2) Don't think your partner is reponsible - being able to accept that you are both responsible for any emotional distress in the relationship is essential to eliminating mutual distrust. Only when you understand that your partner's actions and feelings are an honest reaction to the challenges you face, and that they are entitled to feel that way, can you start to see yourselves as you actually are.
3) Don't engage in self-blame. Doing something is more helpful. This may mean getting the support of a couple's counselor. Or it may mean strategies as easy as reserving time every day to speak to your spouse about what is "up" for you.
4) If you have challenges discussing sexual difficulties consider the things you wish to "bring to the table" before you start. Being prepared is vital in achieving the respect of your partner. It's also important to know what is unacceptable to you in any debate about sex. That way you will be much more likely to keep your self-respect.
5) Be clear about why you are raising the issue. It's often difficult to have full awareness of what's behind our emotions, and it's possible you may only fully realize the real issue as you discuss the problem. And, if you are clear what you want to change, you are more likely to get it. The more openly you express yourself, the more honestly you speak about what's going on for you, the more bonded you will feel in your relationship.
Step 2 - work as a couple on a trusted self-help program for treating male rapid climax. There are several to choose from on the net and a brief search will be enough to discover something that works for you. The essential features you ought to seek out are: genuine references, a money-back guarantee, and an author who is willing to engage with you by email. I have shown in more than 10 years' work men with sexual dysfunction that self-help programs work just as well as clinical therapy for almost all men, if they are highly ready to improve their sexual performance.
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Very Effective techniques to stop the shame of quick climax during sex - click here
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